Chain Letter Depot

You Know What Really Bothers Me...

2011-10-21T17:36:00.000-07:00

Well, I will tell you! Not that you thought I would, but still. What is really bothering me (at least at this very minute) is ants. Yep, ants. The tiny little black ants that thing they are just welcome to any area of your home including the kitchen. They are relentless and they are about to find out so am I.

Oh, did you take the trash out? Yes. Did we leave food on the counter. No. Was the kitchen perfectly spotless. Yes, and thank you Kate. Still, when we got home after being gone all day long a steady stream of ants were crawling out of hole behind the stove. And just in case you aren't sick of me saying yes and no... yes, from behind the stove.

Not looking for a handout or Bill Gates to create a software programs that deals with ants - although that would be cool. Just saying that I absolutely can't stand them and wish they would just leave me alone and build their nest/home base in the woods somewhere.

Needless to say now that I have ranted I have to solve the ant crisis of October 2011. Ant traps you say? Well, I say yes.

One Final Thing... Sorry!

2011-09-30T16:51:00.000-07:00

I should stop hitting "publish post" and just try to finish a thought. See this is what happens when you move from beer to a lower calorie hard alcohol. You blog for hours on end. Oh well, you know you can't stop reading.

To be honest, now I can't stop thinking about my Halloween costume. Do I go something traditional or do I blow them away with a modern fresh idea. Make sense? What to do, what to do. I tend to make my costumes every year so they aren't so mainstream. And, no... before you say it I am not dressing up as Gates. Homer Simpson maybe, but not Gates. This is the hard part. Coming up with a great idea is the hard part. Designing the costume and planning for every detail is the fun part. At least that is how I feel. Others might like to buy a pre-made costume in a bag and if that works for you... well whatever.

In any case, anyone out there have any great costume ideas? Please tell me that I am not the only one who doesn't have their costume planned out. Seriously, it's technically still September. Can't start to plan too early.

I Should Be Ashamed of Myself

2011-09-30T16:44:00.000-07:00

The minute I hit publish I realized I placed a great emphasis on my wedding in November and failed to mention something very important that is sure to happen before that. That one thing I did not talk about and jumped over without any level of respect was Halloween.

Yes, Halloween in just about 30 days we will be able to enjoy one of the best holidays on the plant. And, don't even tell me that you are too old to dress up. YOU ARE NEVER TO OLD! Dressing up is one of the best parts and going to a great Halloween party can make it even better. Every year we go to an amazing party that just makes Halloween the great holiday that it is. Heard they are creating a "scary cemetery" this year and I just can't wait.

So, with that being said... as I try to make myself look better I will look even that much better in my costume. Maybe it's time I moved from beer to bacardi and diet or even vodka on ice. See, I am already making improvements. I don't know if I would call me a nut health, but I would argue that I am starting to head in that direction.

Do My Eye Brows Look OK?

2011-09-30T16:34:00.000-07:00

Well dear friends and fellow readers... we are officially about to enter October which means that we are just that much closer to November and of course, my wedding. Are you as excited as I am? Regardless of your level of excitement I have realized a few things as I inch closer to my union.

Ding, dong, ding dong. Those would be wedding bells in case you were wondering. It has recently dawned on me that some people spend a lot of time and energy into preparing themselves for the big wedding day. And, well, not to surprise you, but I am not talking about emotionally. Working out, tanning, and wide variety of other "maintenance" issues are common for both the bride and the groom. Why am I tell you this? Well, the answer is simple. I haven't done a thing.

Sure I could loose a few pounds and possibly a new hair cut wouldn't hurt, but really I am not 100% sure where to being. And, no I am not waiting for some type of free hand out to get my eyebrows waxed. Just saying I think I need to do something in the next few months to better myself.

And, I Feel Old

2011-09-27T16:53:00.000-07:00

Do you ever have one of those days when you wake up and feel just a little bit older? For me, that day was today. I woke up with a sore back from throwing the football around last night and to be honest, a sore knee too. At what point did the simple act of tossing a football become a an open opportunity for injury? Just curious!

No, I am not looking for an hand out or a pity party. Just want to know if I am the only one going through these type of "changes". Can't wait to hear all the comments on that sentence. In any case, I did get out of bed and manage to get through the day with the help of a little aspirin. Thank you Kate for keeping that in the house. I will remember to check to see if the bottle is full before I go to play football next time.

In any case, I am off to work tonight so I am sure I will see some of you in just a few short hours. Don't give me a hard time if I am moving a little bit slower than usual. I am "aging" after all.

Tonight Is Good

2011-09-22T19:45:00.000-07:00

Thought I was going to talk about grilling again? Or maybe wanting a hand out from Gates? Oh, no my dear friends I am not focusing on those subjects today. Now that the flu is gone and I am back to work (and feeling 110%) I would like to discuss football. Otherwise known as the thing that makes Sundays amazing and the rest of the week that much better.

On average, how much time do you spend watching football or football related shows? Is your plasma on the NFL network 24 hours a day. If so, I get where you are coming from. I love football and I find that when we are in the season I have so much to say about it. More than I do than say, waiting for a hand out or something. Good thing I am not sitting in a gas station while I write this.

In any case, I could probably go on all night. What teams I want to win, who I am starting in my fantasy football league, how much Kate also enjoys football (thank god!), but I will not. See, it's almost 8 where I live and I am about to watch something else that makes me very happy. Fall premiers. Talk to you all later and have a good night.

I Hate Being Sick

2011-09-19T18:10:00.000-07:00

Apparently, EVERYONE is getting sick this week. Doesn't it always seem like the minute you have a cold you hear from a doctor or a friend that EVERYONE is getting sick. That kinda aggravates me because I know I am the only one out of my friends that is sick. Kate is even fine so who is this "everyone" else that is now sharing my pain?

Anyhow, no I am not waiting for some sympathy handout from Gates or from anyone at this point. I would just like to simply express that I hate being sick. Since I woke up this morning I have gone through four boxes of Kleenex or tissue or whatever else you would like to call it. I can't help but to call it Kleenex. Kleenex and Q-Tip are two brands that dominate. Pay respect. He, he, he.

In any case, I am sitting here sick and sharing this random cold medicine induced thoughts with you. Don't pretend that you don't love it. Well, if you are one of the "everyone" group that is sick also, I hope you feel better. Over and out for now. May I suggest vitamin C to everyone?!

Yes, I Am About to Grill

2011-08-31T19:05:00.000-07:00

My mini grill rant has increased my desire to start up the open flame. Tonight it is chicken. I didn't even bother to marinate it since I know I will still be able to cook it to perfection. And, no... this is not the first time the grill has been turned on today.

For breakfast I grilled sausages. Yes, I did and they were delicious. For lunch I grilled burgers and onions. Let's not forget the baked beans on the side. And, in a few minutes I will start the chicken. It has been a simple process that I have completely enjoyed. If you are wondering I did have the day off today.

It didn't take a hand out from Gates to supply this grill feast either. Very affordable if I do say so myself. Think I bought it all for Well, it is about that time since Kate and I are starving. In between eating we have managed to get some last minute wedding planning completed and of course we had some beers too.

Kate is already prepping the side items so I think it's time to start the grill back up. Have a good night all and I hope you enjoy your dinner. Grilled or not.

The Art of Grilling

2011-08-30T19:25:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I have had this blog alive for so long and never mentioned my love for grilling. If it was up to me, I would grill for every meal (including breakfast) and publish my works of art. Grilling is the best thing ever and my mind gravitates toward this form of cooking regardless of the time or day.

I recently bought a $500 range grill that is the most amazing thing I have ever seen. And, no I wasn't waiting for Gates to give me a handout to buy it. Thanks to our local favorite hardware store (which will remain unnamed) I bought the thing at an amazing deal and impressed my wife to be with my shopping skills.

This grill is not just a grill. Imagine a grill with a burner on one side and a sear burner on the other side. It's a work of art. And, yes... I do believe grilling is an art form. You have to understand the food and how it will react with the temperature. Make fun of me if you will, but don't say a word next time you eat my buffalo wings or steak.

Now, I am hungry. Talk to ya later.

August Is Almost Gone

2011-08-29T17:08:00.000-07:00

Once August is over it is hard to say good-bye to summer. September is the kick off for back to school, football, and many other great changes the all mean fall has approached. Did you all enjoy your summer this year? Yeah, I know some of you did more than others (read: spend a lot of time at my bar), but hopefully you all had some time to relax.

Now, we are far from relaxing and no it is not because we are busy waiting for a hand out from Gates. We are business planning a wedding that will be here in just a few months. This is what I am now going to refer to as "crunch time."

Crunch time involves a great deal of finalizing that I will honestly say I thought was already finalized. People must change their minds when it comes to weddings because you have to make decisions, confirm those decisions, review some contracts, sign those contracts, come up with the money and on and on and on.

Welcome to world of crunch time activities. Lets hope that things continue to run smoothly and the crunch is over quickly. Keep your fingers crossed.

Updates

2011-08-28T13:34:00.000-07:00

The draft is completed. No, I am not 100% confident in my team, but what can I say. It turned out that we had a little "emergency" so I ended up auto-drafting. And, yes everything is OK. A burst pipe and minor leak in the garage and grab your attention and actually make you forget about fantasy football. Leak has stopped and nothing was damaged.

So, a little on auto-drafting. Sure, the computer has your best interest in mind, but you are still not in complete control. Auto-drafting with choose the top ranked players in correspondence with what positions you need to fill. The problem is... if you want to take a gamble and grab another player out of order of their pre-determined ranking you can not. Before you even say I am aware that you can set your won rankings, yet since I thought I was going to attend I really didn't bother.

Now, I sit and wait until Thursday. And, no I am not waiting for a hand out from Gates. I am waiting till the first regular season game to get this fantasy football going. If I win, well that would be a good thing.

And, my focus is on...

2011-08-27T17:04:00.000-07:00

Fantasy football. Without a doubt that is and will continue to be one of my number one topics of conversation. And, yes, of course the wedding too. But, after the wedding it may be almost all fantasy football.

The "double F" has been around for several years and I would like to present the argument... what did we do before FF? Sure, you could say we survived with pagers before cell phones and we made it by with rotary phones before that. But, how did we make it by without fantasy football. It is like a whole other dimension of football that we can enjoy and participate with. I wonder who it was that came up with the FF. Anyone want to do some quick research? I am guessing it is not Gates.

I love this season. Thank god is wasn't screwed up. Let's not forget to keep thanking the universe for that one. Well, I am back to watching a little preseason. Expect to hear from me soon especially since we are drafting tonight.

Love ya Kate! Thank you for loving football too. Next year, I think you need to join the fantasy football league. Just something to think about.

November Is It

2011-08-18T19:10:00.000-07:00

No, I have not been standing in a gas station waiting for Bill Gates to give me a handout. I have been busy man! Relationships take work and work takes work so sometime I just need to work at sitting on the couch and not doing (or typing) anything. Deal with it!

I am starting to wonder if we have the longest engagement in history because our wedding dates has changed once again. Is this normal or no? I guess this is what happens when you plan your wedding at your future wife's parent's house and they like to travel a lot. For those of you who have been waiting patiently we sent out the save the dates today. The wedding date is November 26 and yes, it was originally supposed to be August 23rd. Go figure.

In any case, printed documents are in the mail so no more changes can be made. To be honest I originally typed maid, not made. Guess I am secretly hoping a maid walks in and cleans this place up. You can't stop a day dreamer from dreaming. Wow, that sounded stupid.

Have a good night all and be sure to check your mail.

Love Saturday

2011-07-30T13:33:00.000-07:00

So, I just got today off too. Love it! I guess if I talk about having time off on my blog I get time off. Do you think that will really work for my Bill Gates handout too? Probably not. In any case, I plan to spend the rest of the day BBQing and having some drinks with friends. Now, that is a good Saturday.

Kate agreed to do a blog this upcoming week with her updates on all things wedding. Don't expect my same level of humor. Well, of course, she is funny, but is she really funnier than me? I guess i will let you decide when she posts. Who would of thought I would host a guest blogger? Wasn't I just living alone and waiting for handouts at gas stations a year or so ago?

Well, I guess time flies. And speaking of time I am off to enjoy the rest of my weekend. I have to shop and prepare for this BBQ. Well, I guess that means I now have to figure out what to grill. Steaks, shrimp, chicken? Do I have to do a vegetable? Ah, decisions, decisions.

Be in touch soon. Adios.

Still Recovering

2011-07-29T22:02:00.000-07:00

No, I am not recovering from a handout from Gates. If that happened I would still be home counting the money. What I am still recovering from is Comic Con. The event really takes a lot out of you. The lines you have to stand in alone could make anyone tired.

Seriously, I wonder how many people need to take another vacation after Comic Con. If I could, I would of scheduled a full week off just to sit on the couch and relax for bit. As you know, I didn't take time off at all. Half price shot tomorrow BTW. I randomly had tonight off so it is nice to sit back at the computer and talk to you all.

No walking, no standing in line, no comics. The reality is that we are back to wedding planning and real life. I guess stayed tuned for the most recent updates and such. I am hoping Kate will have a part in the next couple of blogs too. Well, heading off to bed. Adios Comic Con fans and well, everyone else. Yeah, you all know who you are.

And, the Name for Your Drink?

2011-07-24T11:07:00.001-07:00

Alright, caffeinated and ready to go. The line... it was nuts. It was one of the moments where you totally know that you will never see anything like this again unless you return to Comic Con.

As the line twisted and turned inside of the stanchions it was next to impossible to ignore the people dressed up in a wide variety of costumes and NEED to know what in the hell these people were ordering to drink. The pirate order a Mocha, Rapunzel went for a chocolate chip cookie and a drip coffee, the Storm Trooper want a ice coffee (although he had to take his mask off to take a sip) and finally Spiderman just wanted a cup of ice. Possibly to freeze his web. Then there was Kate and I standing there in amazement. No costume, no mask, no bueno. Of course, dressing up is optional, but you begin to wonder who is the odd one out when you look "weird" in your t-shirt and jeans.

Well, it is Sunday (read: the last day of the Con) and those circling around us are on a mission to get all their last minute purchases and panels in. I think we may be done for our Con, but you never know. Around every corner there is something that you know you just can't live without. My "nerd" collection recently tripled in size with no help from Gates.

The Pirate at Starbucks

2011-07-24T10:50:00.000-07:00

Man, I will tell ya... Comic Con is really like an endurance test. If you are not in shape, the convention center can easily kick your butt and makes you wish you have started working out in preparation. I would say, without a doubt, that you should never plan on doing anything unless you have time to sit in a line. Lines are the universal "theme" and standard of Comic Con. Oh, you want a shirt... get in line. Oh, you want to see a panel... get in line at least 4 hours in advance. Oh, you need a Starbucks? Plan on being in that line for at least 30 minutes.

Actually, the funniest thing to me was the Starbucks line. And, no not because they were giving out free samples. As we know, I am found of the free handouts. The Starbucks line cracked me up because I walked out of the main hall, turned the corner, and there it was. A line of roughly between 25-40 people just standing there (many of them in costume) just waiting to order their fav drink. Yep, I made my way all the way to Comic Con to tell you about my need for caffeine. Stay tuned. I want to sip on my latte before I give away additional details.

Comic Con and Me

2011-07-22T07:41:00.000-07:00

Well, I love Kate, but I also LOVE Comic Con. If you have never been it is a little hard to explain. Sure, sure it is a convention, yet it not like any other convention that you have attended in your life. I will try to explain, but take time to do some searching and find out what Comic Con is like for others.

First, if you are attending Comic Con you must be ready for lines. The "Con" is held at the San Diego Convention Center conveniently located on the outskirts of the Gas Lamp district. Aside from the quick geography lesson I do have more details to share.

The history... Comic Con started roughly 40 years ago in a small banquet hall at a local San Diego hotel dubbed The El Cortez. As popularity in comics grew (think pre-every movie or summer blockbuster being a comic story) the vendors and artists packed up and moved finally ending up at the SD convention center. Today, the Con grabs and holds onto the attention of people worldwide.

It has transformed from only comics into panels filled with hollywood stars and attractions formed by the top marketing agencies around the world. I am currently sitting in my hotel room about to head over and embark on what is my day one of Comic Con. It actually started with a preview night on Wednesday, but I couldn't get that much time off work. And, not Bill Gates is not handing out money on the corner. All of these peoples spend hundred and hundred (possibly thousands) to attend, stay in SD, and buy everything Comic Con they can.

BRB with more...

Can I Continue on the Smurfs?

2011-07-18T18:28:00.000-07:00

Really, why are the Smurfs all over the place? I just came back from a 2-week vacation with the future Mrs. and I am appalled how many ridiculous signs are all up all over the place. Who thought that this was a good idea? Seriously, I want to know.

It drives me crazy that I have to keep seeing these posters and dumb commercials for a movie I would say is bound to tank. Where are the movie critics and what are they saying about this? Someone, ANYONE!!!

Alright, enough about Smurfs and more on me. Did you miss me while I was on vacation? It was great in case you were going to ask. And no, Bill Gates did not give me a hand out. I paid for this one on my own. The truth is it wasn't that expensive at all. Then again, any extra money we have is really going towards the wedding.

So, are you dying to know where we went and what we did yet? I am sure you are, but you are going to have to wait. Running out to grab dinner. Consider this a teaser. Wait for it...

OK, Last One!

2011-06-30T08:53:00.000-07:00

Did anyone else hear rumors that they were recreating Mr. Mom. Now, I heard this from a friend when I first started my rant about the Smurfs at the bar the other week so I am not 100% sure that it is true. But, if it is I have to post one questions to my readers and friends... WHY!

Again, I am big fan of the original. Micheal Keaton in the original 1983 Mr. Mom was funny and topical for the time. Now, I think it is a slap in the face to everyone subject to the remake and a very big indication that Hollywood has got nothing new. Really, am I the only one that noticed?!
It's even happening with newer movies. Consider this..

That one movie with Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman from a couple years ago that examine the theory of "friend with benefits". Do you remember? Does it seem in any way similar to that new Mila and J.T. movie being released shortly? Similar in any way whatsoever to ya? Characters, story, something?!?

Alright, I think I have to get some more activities in my life so this upcoming week is not so boring and I feel the need to review ridiculous movies and share convos I already had with others. Stay tuned for more interesting topics post 4th of July. We are hosting a party so I am bound to have something to say by then.

Well, I Thought Of One Thing...

2011-06-30T08:45:00.000-07:00

Has anyone else noticed how many films they are making based off old shows are old movies these days? Is this really an indication that the high paid executives in Hollywood can not even think of new movie ides so instead they recreate the Smurfs? Yes, that's right, I said it.

Sure, sure I watched the Smurfs growing up! Who didn't?!? Smurfs, Snorkels, Fraggle Rock, you name it where always on my line up. They were hilarious and very appropriate for there time. Now, I don't care how old I am I can stand hearing about the Smurfs. Have you seem some of these advertisements around town or on the bus stops? I will tell you that I don't think Smurfette looks right and I am not afraid to say it. What makes it even worse is that they slapped on a bunch of ridiculous tag lines that might have been funny in the late 90's, but today just seem sad and misused.

So, I guess I did have something to share during my week of boring. I guess in the silence I was able to look past issues I normally face and get to see these horrible movie ads on a whole new level. Bet Gates would of never let the Smurfs movie go to production. Just saying.

And It Continues

2011-06-29T21:00:00.000-07:00

I am definitely having one of those weeks that just kinda feels like every other week. You never really know if anything huge is going to happen and then when you look back at the last 7 days nothing really happened at all.

I guess depending on your personality you might assume that is a good thing or a horribly boring thing. As for me, I am not sure what I think anymore. At this point I am kinda balancing between being super tired from work, being super stressed from wedding planning, and begin super disappointed B.G. hasn't given me a handout still. Really, how is he expecting me to pay for my bachelor party?

Back to me being boring. Seriously, I woke up and did the same thing every day this week. Almost no change. Yeah, I know some weeks are like that, but come on. I don't even have a funny story to share or a weird incident at the bar to share. Now, after I say that you know it has been a boring, boring, boring, slow week. No need to elaborate. Seriously, I can not think of one thing to elaborate about. I am not kidding.

Can You Say "Happy Belated Father's Day?"

2011-06-20T15:21:00.000-07:00

I have heard Happy Belated Birthday, but I wasn't sure if the same "belated" wishes could apply for any holiday. If they can... well you know what I am about to say. To all my guy friends and family that have kids Happy Belated Father's Day. And, there you go.

I can describe what I did yesterday to celebrate Father's Day in two words. BBQ meat. It felt like my Dad and I had a marathon going of BBQing, eating, and drinking. Seriously, I am going to say that we were outside doing these three activities for about 4 to 5 hours. It was great in case you were wondering. I can't even begin to describe the amount of meat we purchased, cooked, and ate. It felt like we couldn't get enough. Maybe it was that whole protein thing doesn't fill you as fast as carbs. Who knows.

Do you ever wonder how people from different backgrounds celebrate holidays? Sure, you know how your family celebrates, but how do the uber-rich like Gates celebrate? Does he even have kids? In any case those are the thoughts that run through my mind and the same thoughts you are forced to read if you follow my blog. Don't lie... you know you love it.

And, I Got Called Off

2011-06-15T15:13:00.000-07:00

So, I hope anyone out there that was heading down to the bar for my shift has the opportunity to read this first. Not there. I am here. Blogging to you instead of serving you beer. Just come over here already.

I guess things were really slow so there was no need to come in. What, nobody wants to drink on the 15th of June? Is there rule I don't know about? In any case, I am in the perfect mood to be lazy today. Kate is out of town with visiting friends and I have the place to myself. It's an odd thing once you move in with someone. When you are single you take your time alone for granted and when you are in a couple you realize that you don't have very much time alone at all. I guess that is the whole part of give in take.

In any case I am appreciating my little bit of time alone, but still wouldn't mind hanging with friends. Well, the afternoon/night is young. We share see what happens. Maybe Gates will show up at my door and want to take me on his private jet. Oh, there I go with that handout thing again.

Time Flies When You Are...

2011-06-15T15:03:00.000-07:00

wedding planning. Wait, did you think I was going to say "having fun"! I guess I could see me saying that too. So, how have you been? Most of you have been in and out of the bar so I already know that answer, but for the others... please feel free to respond.

Life is good as usual. The date has been set (all problems have been figured out) and things are moving on. Still no hand out from Gates and I have stopped wondering when that will happen. On the other hand, we have been getting hand outs from many other wealthy individuals. Kate has a few close family members that recently donated to our overall wedding fund. The couple is very shy and humble so I will not name names, but I will say thank you from the bottom of our hearts. Without you many of our wedding "wonderful" would not be possible.

It's about that time to get ready to go to work. Come visit and I will give you more details on the rest of life. I think there is some sort of drink specials tonight, but I can't promise anything. This is why I could not be a promoter. Have a good night everyone!

Chicken Tonight

2011-05-30T15:41:00.000-07:00

So yes, the chicken BBQ was amazing too. I felt the need to get back on the blog and tell you all something I found very interesting. I met some people from Australia at the BBQ tonight and well, they get something a little bit better than the occasional three day weekend. This one woman that I met was in the states visiting her family because she had a 2 month vacation. Yes, I said two month vacation. At which at the end of it she could return to her job like she never left.

Are we living in the wrong country? Here I have been asking Gates (read: the rich) for a handout and other people in different parts of the world are getting months at a time off. I think I may have my priorities out of whack.

For those of you that are wondering the entire platter of potato salad was gone within the first few hours. I am kinda wishing we were able to incorporate it into our wedding day meal somehow. Thinking that the last thing Kate and her Mom will want to do is make batch after batch of potato salad the day before the wedding. Just saying.

Potato Salad and Me

2011-05-30T15:37:00.000-07:00

And, I am back. Kate's Mom was at the door dropping off some platter so we could bring potato salad to the party. Kate has this AMAZING recipe I think that her Mom created and they have this one platter that perfectly fits two full batches of the recipe. It seriously is the best potato salad you have ever had. Not too much mayo, the perfect amount of seasoning, and they use all different kinds of potatoes. Hungry?! Alright, back to the pig... It was weird to watch and wonderful to eat.

If I had to rank the whole experience I would give it a 9 out of 10. The only reason I would avoid 10 out of 10 is all the labor it took into the whole production. As you know I am no longer about handouts and not waiting for Gates to give me another car. In any case, my BBQ adventures are not over for the weekend. We are off to one last BBQ (chicken for this one) tonight and then back to the normal work week tomorrow.

Hope you all had a great weekend too. Starting to think every weekend should be a full three days. It's hard to argue that isn't it?

Happy Memorial Day!

2011-05-30T15:26:00.001-07:00

And, a Happy Memorial Day to you. So, are you hung over or still feeling good? I myself am feeling great. Someone very close to our family and group of friends made me realized that I have yet to share the wedding date. And, to that person I would like to say I KNOW! Things have changed a bit and well, the date is something that we are not 100% sure about and most likely won't be until the "save the dates" officially go out. So, yes everything was postponed. Save the dates, invites, and all the good stuff.

What can I say. Things got a little complicated. Now, back to this wonderful long weekend that is about to end. For Kate and I this weekend was a wonderful combination of everything we love and like to do. Hanging out with good friends, family, a few drinks and well, the most wonderful BBQ ever. One of our good friends purchased a whole pig (yes, I said whole pig) and roasted the thing in his back yard.

Hold on, doorbell. No, it not Gates. BRB.

Half to Completely Full

2011-05-23T19:26:00.000-07:00

Well, hello. I just ate a one of the biggest burritos I have ever seen in my life and I may or may not be in food comma. Never really been in food comma before, so I am not sure what warning signs I am suppose to notice here. Incredibly full stomach... check. The sudden urge to take a nap... check. The ability to still drink a beer or two... check. Can't be food comma. I am going to go with just a very filling meal.

Speaking of filling meals we have finalized the menu for thee wedding. Yes, go ahead and applaud. I'll wait. Are you done? Just wanted to make sure before I continue. Most people have told me that I will be too nervous/busy to eat at my own wedding and well, I get that. You all just better eat for me then too.

Still can't believe how many friends and family we will have in one place. Almost feel as popular as Gates. Maybe not that popular. Anyhow, funny story. For the majority of the day Kate has been walking around with one earring on. For some reason I thought she was trying to bring back the 80's, so I finally told her I kinda dug the one and only one earring. Apparently, she didn't mean to do that and is now wondering how many people are making fun of her at work. My advice... just show up with one earring again tomorrow and they will think you did it on purpose. What can I say, I am just the glass is half full kinda guy.

The Master List

2011-05-18T18:54:00.000-07:00

Well, that wasn’t the pizza guy. It was the neighbor asking if we had seen their dog. Sorry buddy, but no. Aren’t dogs supposed to find their way home if they run away? Is that really true or just something we grow up believing in case Fido gets loose? Oh, well… back to me.

So invitations have been chosen and now the guest list is being carefully crafted. Or, should I say fine tuned. I think the guest list was one of the first things we did, but the whole Blue Man thing and Obama was a recent addition. No, the dog-less neighbor is not invited and neither is Gates. We don’t need the car anymore so I really don’t see the point.

Yeah, you know wedding planning is stressful, but you really don’t expect every little aspect to cause such panic. This wedding guest list has been one of the hot topics lately. Especially after we have a beer or two and our real thoughts about relatives we haven’t seen in ten years come out.

And, there is the door bell. If this isn't the pizza guy I think I might have to eat some leftovers from the fridge in the meantime.

Yep, You Missed Me

2011-05-18T18:48:00.000-07:00

Yes friends, I did take a "break" from blogging for a short bit that does not mean I don't love you. Got a little wrapped up in life and wedding life so you will have to forgive my disappearing act. It is safe to say that although I was temporarily M.I.A. it was not because Bill Gates gave me a car and I drove away. So, back to it. Hmmmm... I guess it is time to catch you up with my life. At least catch those up that haven’t already run into each other at the bar.

I guess the most important thing I have to say is did you know that you can invite the Blue Man group to your wedding? Not to mention Obama?!? Apparently, you can send an invitation to Obama and receive a very nice letter that congratulates you. Also, the Blue Men have sent pictures that say “Congratulations (insert your name here)” too. And I was excited to invite my buddy Phil from high school.

So, yes you friends and follower you can conclude that we are on the invitation portion of the wedding planning adventure. More to come after I eat some of this pizza that just arrived.

Yes, I Am Serious!

2011-04-30T19:35:00.000-07:00

After my last post I was asked if I was really serious about the toga party. The answer is YES! I was totally serious! Kate is giving me the freedom to organize the party and you all better be prepared. I want official togas with all the details finally figured out.

On other news, I picked up an additional shift at the bar. No, not because I was expecting Bill Gates to show up and give me a car. More because I want the money for the wedding. The bar has been nuts lately! Which, of course, is a great thing for me. The more people, the more orders, the more tips. See how this works?!?!

Anyhow, I am leaving shortly to head over and Kate is going to create the official bridal party invite. Possibly, maybe you guess will realize I am serious once you see the invite and read the line "toga necessary." I hope you all have a wonderful night and I look forward to hearing your reaction to the invite. Again, read my last posts to learn more about the whole "registry" thing. I would hate to repeat myself. Mike, I know you are laughing after reading that line. Have a good weekend everyone.

Latest Update

2011-04-27T19:12:00.000-07:00

So, as it turns out I get complete control over the bridal shower. Here is how that happened.... 1. We decided to have a co-ed bridal shower. 2. I had a really good idea about the theme. 3. I now have full control over the party so Kate doesn't have to worry about it. This couldn't have turned out better. I am in charge and ready to throw the best bridal shower in history. Something I would never expect to say.

I can only assume that my next sentence will answer one of your most important questions. Yes, there will be a keg. Now, I can only assume that my next paragraph will answer you second most important question.

Yes, I am hosting a toga party. Childish you say. Maybe for Bill Gates who won't show up or buy me a car, but not for our group of friends. Sure, sure you may have to get creative and we welcome the outrageous outfit. But, if you are coming to celebrate my union before we actually have the formal ceremony and union you deserve beer. And I am happy to give you some as long as you come in a toga. Gifts optional.

I Heart the Internet

2011-04-21T10:09:00.001-07:00

I have something to share that I believe is almost better than getting a car from Bill Gates. Are you ready? Wait for it... we are not registering for our wedding. Take a breath here people you can still get us gifts. Instead we are signing up on the site that accepts contributions in specific denominations to go towards your wedding.

So, instead of registering for a third toaster, you can go visit this site and choose what you want to donate to. $20 to our airfare, $50 towards a dinner at the hotel, $100 towards the flight, etc. Are you as excited as I am? This makes the most sense to us and was actually inspired by a friend that called us after reading our last blog. Him and his wife did this and they said it was the best decision they ever made.

We are still welcoming more advice if you would like to share. Just don't tell me to register for a microwave or a new set of pots and pans. And the last thing we really need is yet another knife. Have a good day everyone. Off to the bar.

More from Me Via Kate

2011-04-17T16:38:00.000-07:00

After I hit publish, Kate insisted that I make some comments to my last post. Sure, I don't let comments post on my blog, but I can go ahead and comment on my own posts. Makes sense.

Anyhow, the wedding we went to last week was wonderful. It is not that anything was wrong, especially with the bride and groom, but you just view a wedding differently when you HAVE to learn from their experience. Some brides and grooms shun away advice and suggestions wanting to make their special day their own. Well, we tend to welcome it. Once planning begins we realized that there are so many details that could go wrong that we sought out advice and suggestions. Really, we still are! How someone can pretend how to know what specific choice would be best from everything from the food to the registry is beyond me.

If you ask me, or ask us, we would love to know what you felt was good and bad about your big day. Would you rather have registered for the $200 blender or in hind sight, should you have instead asked for money. Were you happy with that buffet or would an h'orderves party been better? Let me know and I may just start to welcome the idea of comments.

I LOVE BRUNCH

2011-04-17T16:32:00.000-07:00

That's right, I said it. There is no other meal of the week that comes with alcohol before noon. Well, I guess there is, but then again you might have a drinking problem. Not that I am one to judge. Back to brunch.

It's the perfect combination of eggs, sausage, bacon coupled with many not so typical breakfast items including shrimp, lobster, cheese plates, and even a panini. I have never been a big fan of brunch until I visiting this specific restaurant in my area that offered all the above and endless champagne. The type of endless champagne in which you feel your glass is always half full and not half empty. Almost inspiring if I do say so myself. So Gates, I will never receive a handout from you I now know that I can find something even more great. Brunch.

And, yes we went to the wedding and apparently have another to attend in two weeks. Don't know these people whose wedding we are yet to attend, but I can tell you that the Mrs. was right. You do look at wedding differently when you are in or about to be in the wedding planning process. Instead of a wedding it becomes a lesson on do's and don'ts.

It's Not Just Me

2011-04-10T18:15:00.000-07:00

I totally forgot I was invited to a friends a wedding this upcoming weekend. Apparently, I have learned that when you are in the middle of planning your wedding it is your duty to analyze and scrutinize all of the weddings you attend in the meantime. This being said, you are not allowed to find it weird that I was giving a "mental checklist" to see how our friends chose to execute their wedding.

I will tell you, that as much I want to, I am not sure if I will remember this checklist. There is a variety of things to pay attention to and compare to the plan we already have in place. I am all up for strategic planning, but I am going into this friend's wedding feeling a little guilty. Am I spending time happy being happy for this couple and celebrating or am I plotting how I won't make my wedding the same as their's? More importantly, one could bring up the point that I wouldn't want anyone spending more time with a mental checklist at my wedding versus celebrating our big day.

All things aside, my new car (not from Gates) will be getting us to and from a wedding.

Thanks TV

2011-03-31T20:04:00.000-07:00

Do you ever have those moments when you wondered what you would do without TV. I mean your favorite shows are one thing, but the general entertainment of TV is almost unmatched. And, as I type that I glanced at my iPod and take that statement back completely. Addicted to the games and apps is an understatement for me. I could play some of those game all day long and I have no problem doing so on occasion. Well, since apparently I don't know what I am talking about tonight would you like a wedding update.

In my head I just heard half of my friends shout "NO!" and the other half shout "YES!" And, yes, now I am laughing. Alright, no wedding talk for one blog. I am above talking about my wedding every five minutes. I guess I should say most of the time I am above talking about my wedding every five minutes.

So, guess who still has not donated to my wedding fund. Bill Gates. Wait, I mean, nothing more on weddings for the time being. Wanna talk about my new car? I think it's best I say goodbye and go worship the TV again. Have a good night all.

Mr. Sensitive

2011-03-30T19:46:00.000-07:00

Yep, got the most feedback from friends, family, and followers on that last post. Guess everyone actually wants to hear and know that I have feelings. Apparently, now I am the sensitive dude. The sensitive dude with the car.

Think B.G. would shed a tear if he found out I was sensitive. Probably not. But, you know who would... my finance. So here is the status update for those of you that are now apart of my wedding planning.

She bought her dress. This supposedly is a big landmark in the wedding planning agenda. It marks one of the most difficult decisions the bride can make. The dress is everything I recently learned. A couple of months ago I would have not know this, but now I am well versed. It most likely will add to my sensitivity levels.

The shoes are also ordered and our down payment has been made to the reception location. This I have been well versed on ever since I saw the "estimated" grand total. Yes, I did say estimated.

If you really want to be a part of my wedding planning feel free to contribute as much money as you want. This thing is getting EXPENSIVE.

Let Me Have A Moment

2011-03-28T20:42:00.000-07:00

You know what the best part about having a new car is? Having a new car. Yep, it is that simple. New car smell. New car seats. New car paint. It all just seems to revolve around the fact that it is NEW.

It can almost make you stop and wonder what else that holds true for. Relationships, engagements, pots and pans. Does the fact that something is new make it more worthwhile? In the life of me and Katie I have to say yes. But, before everyone we know begins to freak out like this is a bad statement it is not. A few days ago, I was still obsessed with the fact that I would have to work for a living and I wouldn't get a hand out from B.G. up to and including a car.

Today, I understand that because of a new relations and new goals and new levels of trust I am open to new possibilities. New options present you with new choices. Too deep for 8:45 on a Monday? Have you hand enough beer where this makes sense or too much beer and you are already crying.

Dude. Get a tissue. I need to express sometime and somewhere.

Is That For Me?

2011-03-25T18:48:00.000-07:00

Remember how I told you not to ask me about my computer trouble a couple of weeks ago? Well, I am going to have to say it again. And, just like before I don't want to talk about it, but I will give you my one and only solution. My Clean PC. Try it, love it, and then continue on with your day.

Speaking of continuing on with your day, a brand new car was sitting in front of my house this morning. No, it was not from Gates, but good guess. It was an engagement gift from my future in-laws. Imagine that! All this time I have been looking to B.G. to give me a present (read: car) and my in-laws did. Who would of thought. I guess I could go into theories on the power of suggestion, but hey, that's not me. Computer advice I can give. Laws of the Universe you will have to get from someone else.

If they are reading this, can I say thank you? I am beginning to love you just as much as I love your daughter. You are setting the bar pretty high though! What is the wedding present going to be?

Well, I am off to work/have a beer before I have to go to work. Have a good weekend everyone and can I say Mission: New Car completed?

I Can Name Them If I Want To

2011-03-16T20:10:00.000-07:00

The bar has been nuts this week. Actually, I have been picking up more shifts than usual so that is all good. I hope you took my advice from my last post. Have to say that software really saved my computer.

Yeah, so life. Things seem to be moving way fast. Almost too fast for me to wonder where my Bill Gates handout is. Well, alright, maybe not that fast. My apartment (or should I say our apartment) is starting to resemble a bridal boutique. I am not sure if there is a bridal magazine published this month that is not currently sitting on the coffee table. The coffee table should really be called "the wedding planning table."

Swatches, lists of vendors, and planning guides are almost covering all the 10-20 magazines. Kate should write for one of these magazines at this point. She can also recite all the dos, don'ts and try its sprinkled throughout each issue. That has got to be a talent.

As for me, I have chosen my groomsmen. Are they called groomsmen? Guy party, guys on my side, guys that will have to wear a tux and pretend they are happy about it. I think the latter should be their name.

Dude...

2011-03-11T19:08:00.001-08:00

Dude, sorry I haven’t posted in a while. Before I tell you why, can I take a second to highly recommend MyClean PC. I am not sure what state my computer would be without it.

I hit a wall of frustration last week. Come to find out I had spyware and viruses. Not hard to believe if you saw how slow and funky my system was running. Anyway, before I give you the rest of my life update go check it out if you need it. No, I take that back. Check it out even if you don’t think you need it. There can be harmful stuff lurking around your computer causing damage and chaos. Just take care of it before it becomes a further problem like mine.

So, back to me (and things not computer related) Bill Gates has still not “gifted” me with any type of handout. That is unfortunate since it turns out wedding planning is one of the most expensive events on the planet. My checkbook has been hiding and those deposits I keep hearing I need to come up with just aren’t there. Maybe my computer was just as stressed as I was.

Brb with more later. Check out My Clean PC already!

Forgot to Ask...

2011-02-28T19:50:00.001-08:00

Did you watch the Oscars? Ha! How many times did you hear that today? Isn't it weird how everybody wants to know if you watched them, but most of them didn't watch it themselves. I swear they should just make a highlight show so no one has to watch them. I think people feel like they have to watch them just so they can talk about it.

Honestly, I can watch the red carpet and then call it quits. Oh, only if I could have really met Scarlett in real life. JK Kate!! Really, you have to wonder what they really look like under all that makeup. Think they have the occasional breakout? Or even worse... a wrinkle?!?!?

I did watch some of it and I have to ask, what is up with the hundred million outfit changes. Every time Anne walked on stage I had to double check if it was really her or someone else in a different outfit. Those changes were nuts! How did they even have enough time to make that happen? Those hair-do's (did I spell that right) alone seemed like they would take 2 hours.

Got Today Off

2011-02-28T19:41:00.000-08:00

I was on my way to work when I got a random call from a co-worker that really needed my shift for some reason. Needless to say, I let her have it. Not that you couldn't already figure that out. I am of course, here writing to all of you.

Anyhow, I guess you all now know the story that lead me to become an engaged man. It is still totally weird to say it. I always thought one day I would automatically feel old enough or at a certain point when I felt getting married was the next step. Then, one day I realized I may never be as rich as Gates and I may never have my dream job so why am I wasting days and moments hoping these other life accomplishments will happen before I say "I do"?

Speaking of the Mrs. I called her a couple of times and haven't heard back. She did think I was working, so maybe she made other plans. A night alone in the apartment is now weird. All of her stuff is here, but not her. Never thought I could miss a person this much. Well, off to watch Idiot Abroad. Love that show.

Back...

2011-02-27T19:21:00.000-08:00

Sorry. The minute I hit post I realized, well you could of just walked away and came back to finish the story. But, no! I have to publish the still unfinished story like you could tell I walked away from the computer or something. Maybe at some point I will realize it is a blog, not a face-to-face conversation.

Alright, back to it. Yes, that was Kate on the phone and not Bill Gates. Instead of hoping from a hand out from Gates I am realizing I need to start planning for my own future.

And the story continues... I give Mom her flowers and she hands them off to Kate who was more than happy to put them in a vase. She just had to run to the bathroom first! It seriously felt like she was in there forever. Mom pulled out a vase, left it by the flowers, and then started to make us all a drink so Kate didn't wonder why she just couldn't put the flowers in herself.

Kate finally comes out and grabs the flowers. She used scissors to cut up the side of the plastic and decorative tissue paper. Then she filled the vase and started grabbing each individual stem to gently place them in some type of planned arrangement. Two stems into it she grabbed the one with the box attached.

I Will Finish This Story...

2011-02-27T19:05:00.001-08:00

Hey all. Sorry again for the delay in the story. This month has really been so busy I can't believe how fast it went by. That always makes me feel old when I say that. I always think of my parents talking with their friends and saying how quickly times goes by. Now, here I am making the same comments.

Alright, back to the story. So I called her parents and they wanted us to stop by for the actual proposal since I really didn't have it planned out yet. I thought, oh well, I guess that can work. She would never expect me to propose at her parent's house. So, there we were. Dressed up to go to "dinner" after the quick stop at the parents.

I had the lilies (her fav flower) that were supposedly for her Mom and the ring was hidden inside. Actually, I used some ribbon and tied the box to the stem of the one of the lilies. The plan was that I would give the flowers to her Mom and then her Mom was going to ask her to put them in water. We all were going to casually following her into the kitchen and hang out and chat as she unwrapped the flowers and found the box. The phone is ringing ( it's Kate not Gates!)... brb.

Dear Valentine's Day...

2011-02-14T19:25:00.000-08:00

Dear Valentine's Day,

I would like to formally thank you for coming once every year and finally finding me on a year that I have a girlfriend. Actually, I would like you to know that I dominate this holiday and may just qualify for best boyfriend (soon to be live in boyfriend) of the year.

I would also like to take this opportunity to inform you that my budget did not include a hand out from Bill Gates, but it was still enough to make the day memorable. Check out what I did for my girl.

Part One: I planned that she would sleep over last night so she would wake up in my bed to a fully prepared gourmet breakfast. Eggs Benedict, fresh squeezed orange juice (with the option of champagne) and her favorite fruit, blueberries.

Part Two: We went for a hike on her favorite local trail that leads you to one of the most romantic spots I have ever seen. At that point, I gave her the necklace I purchased. All hand-crafted from her favorite stone.

Part Three: We went home and watched a bunch of her favorite shows I recorded and ate her favorite snack... humus and pita with garlic stuffed olives.

It is now 7:30 and I am about to take her to the final portion of my Valentine's Day spectacular so stay tuned.

Sincerely,

Happy V Day Continued Several Days Later

2011-02-14T15:16:00.000-08:00

Step Four: Propose...

Oh yeah, it happened. I told you I rocked Valentine's Day right? Well, it took me this long to post because, well life has been nuts. My plans were simple because I spent all the money (Read: my tips from the bar) on the ring. I had no idea how much engagement rings cost. At first I thought I needed to save like a $1,000 then I realized I need to save much more with no thanks to Bill Gates. Still no hand out for me.

Alright, here is how it went down... I actually called her Mom and told her that I wanted to come over and talk to "Dad." I asked him for her hand in marriage about 15 days before and he was blown away. They insisted that I propose with them present so I made a big deal about stopping by their house on the way to dinner. I told her that I bought lilies (which I did) for her Mom and wanted to drop them off on our way to dinner.

Man, just realized what time it was. I have to run for a late shift at the bar. I will tell ya the rest later.

And My Next Thought Was...

2011-01-31T15:52:00.000-08:00

Should I propose? That question just dawned on me the minute I hit publish and thought more about Valentines Day. I guess that is an odd questions for someone who just said about 30 seconds ago that he didn't want any more change and was happy with the things they way there are.

Proposing doesn't mean that you get married the next day. Maybe I could propose on Valentines Day and then we can just be engaged for a bit. People are normally engaged for a year or two before they tie the knot, right? Is there some standard amount of time that I do not know about? What am I missing? No need to rush into planning or anything. Well, something to think about. I guess I would really need that hand out from Gates for the ring.

Marriage. Wow. Every time I think of weddings I think of Michael's wedding speech from the Office. Did you see that episode because it was HILARIOUS!!! Or that scene from Princess Bride when the priest just keeps going on, and on, and on, and on. Even funnier!!!

Alright, off to work.

14 Days To Go

2011-01-31T15:35:00.000-08:00

Well, I am bored. Last couple of hours of the afternoon before I have to go to work. Still no word from Dan (or Gates) and I have given up, at least for today. I guess I really will have to go to work and stop expecting my B.G. handout.

That's alright. Katie is suppose to come to the bar tonight and hang (read:talk to me for hours) during my shift. Monday nights are super slow especially when there is no more Monday Night Football. I guess it is to be expected after the New Year too. All those fresh resolutions to not drink as much seem like a good idea while you still only a couple of weeks in. I am guessing I will start to see all my regulars back by mid-February.

As you know, I started the year with no resolutions. Kinda happy where I am right now and I think I am OK if it stay like this for some time. I am a little worried about Valentines Day though. I just saw my first jewelry commercials of the year this morning. And, the pressure is on. My world is about to become jewelry, chocolate, and roses.

The Pro Bowl and Other Confusing Events

2011-01-31T10:18:00.000-08:00

Does anyone really watch the Pro Bowl? Really, who is it that watches the Pro Bowl? Did you see any coverage on it? The stands were even kind of empty. Hilarious. 41-55.

Now onto other confusing events... I hate it when I recommend someone for a job and they end up screwing it up. A friend I met at the bar is looking for a web site designer so without really thinking about it I recommended my other friend Dan. I went on and on about his work, his abilities, and all the stuff you are suppose to say. I even gave the guy Dan's website address and contact info.

Three days later the guy is back at the bar and he is less then impressed with Dan. Shock. I should have known better. The guy sets a meeting with Dan "the idiot" on Monday morning and Dan does not show up. In addition to the no-show, he doesn't call, doesn't email, doesn't reschedule. Nothing. How do people hand this situation? The guy was looking at me like I was an moron for recommended Dan and honestly, he was right.

What would Gates do? He probably wouldn't have made the recommendation or hang out with Dan in the first place.

Project Clean

2011-01-30T15:43:00.000-08:00

I am happy to report that my apartment is already cleaned out and ready for Project: Girlfriend Move In. The date still stands on February 28th, but I have already noticed more and more of her belongings around. She says that it is easier to leave some stuff here over the month so their is less to do on the 28th. Sure, sure I get it, but I actually think that it means the "move in" date already happened.

Honestly, I am starting to feel like Gates a bit. I am now going to have more money every month since we are splitting rent, utilities, and stuff like that. Well, maybe not exactly Gates, but I do have some extra cash in my pocket. Got to love that.

My neighbor just got a guitar and has been playing non-stop. If I hear Stairway to Heaven one more time I think I might loose it. I actually considered inviting him over for a beer just to stop his practice session. Is that wrong? Not that I care. I most likely will invite him over. It's that or I start playing the real version on the loudest possible setting so he realizes how horrible he is.

Looking Towards the Future

2011-01-24T19:06:00.000-08:00

Every year the football season seems to go by quicker and quicker. I don't know if it happens become I am getting older (and of course, more handsome) or if it happens because I play fantasy football. Fantasy football can make every day fly by. Really, I am not sure what does it.

All I really can tell you is that life is good. Still no hand out from Gates, but life is good. My girl is good, my job is good, and that means life is good. Did I type "good" yet? Anyway, we are about to enter February which means that I am entering my last month living as a single man. She is officially moving in on February 28th and I am spending the next several weeks packing (read:throwing away) a wide variety of items that I can now go without.

Those couch pillow with the holes (recently found out they are called throw pillows) are just one item among the many things that can now call the dump their home. My old magazines (goodbye Scarlett) and plenty of other unnecessary items will be gone. And, for now, that is all I have to say.

CES and ME

2011-01-13T14:30:00.000-08:00

It's 2011 and I have come to yet another conclusion. Bill Gates and I might share an interest... the CES show. Well, it might not be just me and Gates. The CES links global markets and catches the attention of countless people around the globe. And, why shouldn't it? With all the tech-heads and gadget addicted people the CES should catch just about everyones attention. It makes it almost impossible to decide what to save my money for next. Any suggestions?

Well, I kinda left you hanging on my "ah-ha" moments over the holidays. I was on a role with my realizations until, that is, I forgot to stop having them. Guess it kinda of happened along the same time I met Katie. Go figure. And, yes she decided to move it. Not until March (due to her apartment lease) and I think it will work out fine.

The good news is I really won't need some time of monetary handout to fix up my place. Katie is bringing everything she owns with her. I guess this means I will have a stocked kitchen and two couches. Two beds I guess too. Hmmmmm… we have a lot of logistics to figure out.

Until 2011

2010-12-30T13:45:00.000-08:00

I have consciously decided that this will be my last post of 2010 since I have some rather big news to share. I really want to leave you with this one piece of information so it was my last contribution to the internet of this year.

This is a little out of character for me and honestly, it's the first (and hopefully only) time that I will be in this situation. Take a deep breath and get ready for it. I (wait for it) am asking (wait for it) Kate (really wait for it) to move (wait for it) in with me. Phewwww. Were ya expecting that one? It's going down on New Year's Eve and I feel confident posting this since I made her promise to take a week off reading my blog. Told her it involved a present and she believed me.

Well, you will get my next post in 2011. Prepare yourselves. Happy New Year to all the friends, fam, and readers that follow. Oh, and Happy New Year B. Gates. I hope you make even more money next year and actually find me to give me that handout. I'll need it if Kate moves in. I only own one pan.

Already Got One

2010-12-29T18:25:00.000-08:00

Oh, I forgot to tell you... got a promotion at the bar. Thank you Bill! Bill B. that is not Bill Gates. Bill B. is the manager at the bar and recently gave me several night shifts in addition to other days shifts. So far it's a nice balance between days and nights. Balance in my life. Never thought I would actually say I had it. Beer I always had, but not necessarily balance.

So, more work talk. I told you a lot of people where home visiting for the holidays. It seems that everyone I went to high school with that left is now back here and sitting at my bar. Yes, I said my bar. I may not own the thing, but when I am bartending it is my bar.

Really weird to see some of these faces from the past. I will admit some have aged better than others. Much better than others. Actually, some of these people may be spending more time at their local bars that out in daylight. The pale factor made me feel like I was in one of those vampire movies. Pass. This is not Forks and I am not looking for a love. I already have one.

Christmas High

2010-12-29T18:02:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve rocked. And, believe it or not, Christmas was even better. Actually, every single day since Christmas has been amazing. Calm, but amazing. Actually, crazy yet amazing. Well, not calm, not crazy... just perfect.

So, needless to say, things are going well with Kate. Between work and Kate life has been turning better and better. Tons of people were in town for the holidays to visit family, so business has been insane. Bar business, not me making burgers business if you were wondering. I am really looking forward to New Year's Eve (yep, I am not working) since I can be with Kate. First Christmas, first New Year's Eve, first whatever. Kate, Kate, Kate, Kate, Kate. Is it getting annoying that I am talking about her so much yet?

Did I mention everything is going well with Kate? Taking a huge pause on the realizations and the looking out for Gates and my handout. Gates may have more than I do, but I have never been happier in my life. I mean the rain could let up. Otherwise, everything is just perfect.

Yes, I am still wearing the scarf and loving every minute of it. K A T E!!!

Nailed It!

2010-12-24T16:39:00.000-08:00

Nailed it! Thanks Bill Gates for never finding me and giving me a hand out I did nothing for! She LOVED the picture. She walked around and showed every single entire family member the picture and then also told them about the night the picture was taken.

Ugh, I was so freaking nervous for nothing. Her family was so chill and amazing. The dinner was awesome and I can not believe what amazing cooks her Mom and Dad are. Together they made this incredible meat lasagna, garlic bread, salad, and every single Christmas cookie imaginable.

So, I guess you are wondering what she got me. A scarf! Simple, right?! The scarf was actually a reference from the very same exact night I had our friend take that picture of us. We left the bar and took a walk and it was SO COLD! For some reason we started talking about how great it would be have a scarf at that very moment. She got me a scarf and a card that referenced that conversation.

Great night. Absolutely a great night. I think this relationship might be going somewhere. If it is, I can only hope I don't screw it up somehow. She is amazing and if she is reading this... Kate, thanks for a great Christmas Eve.

And There is More

2010-12-24T16:31:00.000-08:00

Um... remember how I said that my new lady friend invited me to Christmas Day with her family? (If not, you are a little behind and should of read my last blog!) Well, now this holiday family event is also including Christmas Eve. This is good and well, fairly bad for several reasons. Two main reasons actually.

Reason #1: Still no hand out from Gates and surprisingly no Christmas bonus from the bar. All of this means that my present is not exactly... expensive. I had a friend take a picture of us at the bar a few days ago and I printed it and framed it.

Reason #2: The original plan was to exchange gifts on our own and not in front of her family that I have never met. Now, I have to bring my framed picture of us and give it to her in front of her entire family during this gift exchange session. What if she spent a lot of money on me? Do hand made gifts still seem cool after you leave elementary school?

My stomach is turning. Why am I so nervous? I hope her family is cool.

8 Days Till Christmas

2010-12-17T15:39:00.000-08:00

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me... a be-ee-er, and it was free. What's up readers and friends?

The holidays are finally here and thankfully, I am in the holiday spirit this year. I decided to put all hopes aside that Bill Gates was going to somehow find me and give me a hand out. Instead I decided to focus on reality (which can be harder than you think) and make this Christmas season the best I have ever had.

Did I mention I met a girl? No, not Scarlett, but hot in her own right. I think the Christmas present I get her will be key to our future relationship. I can only hope the bar givea us some kind of Christmas bonus. The "official" Christmas party is tomorrow so I will keep you updated. I wonder if Gates hands out bonuses. He must.

Anyway, I am trying to figure out this big question. She invited me to her parent's house for Christmas. We have only been dating for two weeks (yeah, now you understand why I haven't made a post lately) and I wondering if it is too early to meet the ENTIRE family. As much as I question it, I think I will be in attendance anyway. Well, I will update you soon.

Burnt Burgers

2010-11-30T18:56:00.000-08:00

Remember when I said I would be a horrible chef? Well, I was right. The bar's cook called in sick at the last minute and they asked me to help in the kitchen. Ah... what do they not get about me hating to cook?

I would of have been happier at the bar waiting for Bill Gates wanna-bes to tip me $2 on their $4 beers, but no. (Maybe even the occasion $5 tip out of pity.) I was stuck in the kitchen flipping burgers, burning bacon, and turning rolls back and chard. I would send burgers out and within one minute they were sent right back. Half way through my shift I actually started to get the hang of all the cooking. It might not have been perfect, but it was much better than when I started.

It's 7pm and I as so happy to be home and honestly, I could go to bed right this minute. I am exhausted. Well, I might have to have a beer (or two) before I call it a night. I mean, I am not really that tired. The cooking thing should never happen again. It must never happen again.

Time for the Office

2010-11-30T12:02:00.001-08:00

Well, I am about to go into the office (I mean the bar!) in a few hours. It is so cold outside it looks like I might freeze the minute I open the door. You know what I want... one of those cars that you can turn on from your house with the remote control. Then I could start the car, let it heat up, and just run really fast to the warmth. Sounds good to me.

I wonder what winter is like for those people (including Gates) up in the Northwest? Snow, icicles, brrrr. I guess that would be one season I would hate to live up there. I think 50 is freezing. Maybe that will be the new drink I make at the bar... BELOW 50.

On to the serious. Have you guys heard of Astrobiology? (No, it is not a word that I just made up.) Supposedly, NASA is suppose to reveal some kind of findings on life in outerspace. That is freaking amazing! I can't wait to hear about this! Can you imagine if there is really life out there. It is so exciting yet so scary at the same time.

A Shocking Burrito

2010-11-29T17:34:00.000-08:00

I just grabbed a chicken burrito from my favorite local Mexican diner and ran into one of my buddies I haven't see in a while. The guy was married with a 4 month old daughter! Man, that was a shocker. I mean, this guy did not seem like the marrying type, but there he was ordering a bunch of greasy absolutely delicious food for himself and his family. Oh, I guess maybe just his wife. Four months olds still just do the bottle, right?

Anyways, I was really surprised. It made me feel old and well extremely unproductive. I am thankful I have a job, but I can't stay at this bar forever. I think I need to get things moving and keep searching for something more "office" than "bar." Then again, maybe I am just going to take a non-traditional life path. Is there really even a normal life path anymore? I mean we can't all be multi-billionaires with a beautiful wife and happy kids. Can we? I don't even know what it is I want anymore. I guess it's time to go back to the drawing board and start to really figure this whole thing out. Maybe I don't need to change my job I just need to change my perspective.

Not As Planned

2010-11-27T14:09:00.001-08:00

Remember how I said I was going to be cheery and optimistic for the next couple of days? Well, that didn't happen. I got the flu, had a 103 temp and got stuck in the urgent care Thanksgiving night with all the other individuals that currently pay a high monthly premium for horrible insurance coverage.

I mean really, why am I paying almost $150 a month to get this type of coverage? It's all about how much money you make. I bet you Bill Gates has a doctor on call and never would even think of stepping foot in some low-grade urgent care.

My frustration levels had doubled. In addition to the "poor man's" treatment, I ended up taking a cab back home because I was too feverish to drive. I ended up back at home with no one there to take care of me. No wife or girlfriend, no friend, and absolutely no maids or butlers to cater to my every need. If I ever make even a fraction of the amount of money Gates does the first thing I will do is hire a butler. If I don't find a wife I am going to need the support of another human being. Ugh.

Ohm

2010-11-23T17:12:00.000-08:00

Just kidding! I told you no meditating. ;) So, ugh... things have kinda been lack luster lately. For the last several years, holidays tend to get me down for one reason and one reason only. Money. Look, don't get me wrong, I try my best to be thankful and give as much as possible. I just hate that I never seem to have enough money to do what I truly want to.

Get it, not Bill Gates. Yet, would it kill one of my employers to give me a holiday bonus? I mean I can barely afford to make ends meet and now I am suppose to come up with money for gifts for my friends and family. Do you know how depressing it is to buy your friend a beer when you really wanted to get them tickets to a home game divisional championship? Or better yet, maybe even just a jersey from their favorite team. The ability not to be able to give makes me depressed and therefore the holidays tend to drive me nuts.

Alright, I have heard that my posts can get a bit dreary so I will try and pick it up a bit. I will make a positive post everyday from now until Thanksgiving just to prove my point. Be prepared for me. Me, thankful.

Anxious for More?

2010-11-14T16:22:00.000-08:00

Alright, can you honestly believe that my friend rented a limo for Halloween. It took me this long to be able to even try to tell you about that night. It was amazing! I felt like a millionaire or actually more like a more wealthy than Bill Gates quad-zillionare.

We went everywhere and saw just about everyone we knew. (And, looked really good doing it.) The party was indescribable, the costumes were unforgettable, and I am ready to burn these memories in my brain as one of the best nights of my life. BURNT!

Needless to say, the next day (after the hangover vanished) I was trying to focus and get back into the swing of normal life. Afternoon shifts, saving money, and well... I guess waiting for the unexpected. So far, the unexpected has proven to be extremely amazing. Yes, I am ready for more.

I had to pause on the realizations to stop and spend time enjoying life. Do not hate me, just understand that sometimes life happens while you are waiting to understand why it is happening. Now, I am just getting too deep. ;) Let's not start meditating, but let's start enjoying every moment.

Long, Dark, and Full of Candy

2010-10-31T17:13:00.000-07:00

Yeah, that wasn't his car. Can you tell I am getting anxious. I can't sit still and wait so I am typing away till this guy gets here.

When I thought I heard the car I opened the door and a limo went by. (Maybe Scarlett is looking for me.) The other thing I noticed... there are a lot of kids in this neighborhood. I am totally a jerk. I am assuming my place is the one with no lights on that kids have to pass by in order to get to my cool neighbors that decorate their front yard, play creepy music, and actually hand out full size candy bars instead of the mini versions.

That's it... next year I am getting some decorations and leaving that bowl of candy. No, I am not staying home. I need to see the ladies in those costumes and I don't feel bad enough to miss out on that. I just heard another car and... nope not him. You know the more I think about it, the more I don't like this guy. He better show up before I completely decide I hate him. It won't take that long I can tell ya for sure. The limo just parked. Oh man, it's my friend. He rented a limo. BYE!

Late, As Always

2010-10-31T17:08:00.000-07:00

Alright... he is late. Patience is not one of my best traits. I absolutely HATE to wait for people especially when I am about to go out or have an amazing night. This guy is always late, I should have known. I should of gone to pick him up. Never mind, I would not want to be the designated driver on Halloween. That would destroy it. Wait... we should of hired a driver. I bet you Bill Gates has a driver. Man, I need to start thinking more like Gates.

I realized when I opened my door to look outside that I have never purchased Halloween candy for the trick-or-treaters. Is that normal? Do most guys my age purchase candy and stay home passing it out? I have never been that guy. Maybe that's something you do when you are married, about to have kids, or of course have kids.

I honestly can't believe I have never invested in a bag of candy. Am I a jerk? Well, maybe next year I can leave a bowl out or something. Yeah, I will leave a bowl out. Just heard a car pull up. Time to party.

Little Gray in the Hair

2010-10-31T17:01:00.000-07:00

Well, before I even start, HAPPY HALLOWEEN everyone! If I had to choose one of my favorite holidays of the year it would be Halloween. Contrary to what you may think it is not just because of how the ladies dress up. I mean I do love that, but that is not the only reason why. :)

Every year I try to top my last costume. It was Captain Morgan last year and champagne rep the year before . This year I dressed like the Most Interesting Man in the World. (Are you catching the theme of my characters here?!) Halloween is the most amazing day of the year. Every seems to really live it up on Halloween no matter what their age. It is almost the perfect holiday. Yet, I can't go to Bill Gates house and scream trick-or-treat for a monetary handout. I guess you can't ask for everything.

Let's see here... it is about 5pm and my buddy will be showing up to pick me up shortly. I guess it is time to throw a little gray in my hair and get the suit on. A good night to you everyone. May your Halloween be filled with many tricks and even more treats.

Browns Shock

2010-10-24T14:42:00.000-07:00

Alright, let's be honest. I know that Gates is not giving me a handout. I know that I finally scored a job and it at least pays the bills. I know that I might not be lucky enough to find a girlfriend, never mind one that looks like Scarlett. You want to know what I don't know? (Yes, I realize there are many things) I would have never guessed that the Browns were going to win this week.

Football fans (other than Browns fans) please chime in here. Who would have seen this coming? I would have never thought, never mind considered, that this would be a possibility. Let's put it this way... in all 14 games this week if I have to pick one 100% win I would have opted for the Saints over the Browns. I can't imagine that I was alone in this.

Shocked. I am nothing, but shocked. I have spent the last several months coming to several realizations and working on improving my life. I have faced hard times and I have been forced to switch directions in my personal and social life. All these changes did not shock me as much as this win. Looking forward to next Sunday.

Scratch It Harder

2010-10-18T14:17:00.000-07:00

After my shift (and three Billies) I started to leave the bar and head home. I made a pit stop at my local liquor store to replenish my dwindling beer stock at home and honestly, could not believe what I was seeing.

There was this older gentleman that looked to be in his 70s. He had brown polyester pants that crept up above his waist line and a light mustard colored shirt that was neatly tucked inside the pants. His hair was all salt (probably no pepper for years) and it was neatly combed over his scalp from the right to the left. He made his way up to the counter before I managed to make my way up there. He purchased six $1 lottery tickets and went over to the other side of the counter to begin scratching. And, when I say scratching I mean a wild fast approach to scratch tickets. He had a nickel out and the first one was scratched before I could even realize what he was doing. By the time I had paid for my beer, all six were scratched and he was standing behind me to redeem what he had won only to use his winnings to purchase more tickets.

Now, this guy was definitely not looking for a hand out from Gates. This guy was going to gamble, collect his winnings, and reinvest. I wanted to stay and continue to watch the process. How long would his luck last? The cold beer in my hand seemed to sound more entertaining though and I drove back home.

Miss Me

2010-10-13T17:18:00.000-07:00

Guess where I have been. Go ahead and guess. I have been far away from my computer because I have been working. Are you in shock? I still am. About 8 days ago I landed a job that involves one of my most favorite things. Alcohol and burgers. Yep, that's right, I am a bartender at our local burger joint.

One might think that I would be over qualified for this position, but in all actuality I am not. Apparently, if you have never been a bartender you end up with a variety of day shifts and you are forced to work your way up to nights. Odd right?! (Yes, it is in case you were too afraid to answer). So no, I am not making Bill Gates' salary, but it is definitely better than not making any money at all.

My favorite drink to make is one that I came up with by myself. It's called the Billie. (Guess why?) And, wait for it... it's a beer with a shot of whiskey. Only a matter of time before I am on those night shifts. Honestly, I would much rather keep the day shifts. Keep my nights for myself and some "Billies."

Yeah, I Am Not Done

2010-09-30T20:51:00.000-07:00

Lobster. Filet Mignon. Pizza. Alright, I know the third may not be as exciting, but I am not over this personal chef thing. Can you imagine the possibilities?

Dishes you have never experienced before and food combinations that you never knew existed would be at your disposal. Anytime, anywhere, anyhow you want a meal you could have it. I can't believe it took me this long to thing of this perk. Nevermind, I can't believe that you thought I would only post one blog on this subject.

If Bill Gates does not have a personal chef I would love to ask him why. He is not giving me a handout so I am sure he as that extra room in his budget for a luxury like this. You know what, I think I would learn to cook every dish known to man if Gates would hire me as his chef.

Time to stop with the food for a second. I have news that I forgot to tell you in the last post. One, I met a girl. Two, I had an interview. I am going to make you wait for details. Seriously, I am spending the rest of the night working on my visualizations.

The Plate Issue

2010-09-30T20:41:00.001-07:00

You know what else I would be awful as... a chef. (These really aren't that hard to come up with.) My idea of a home cooked meal is something that is delivered to my front door that I can put on one of my three plates. If it is on your own plate that is kind of like a home cooked meal. I am serious! You know what transfers from a take-out container to a plate easily? Chinese food. Yeah, you can always make it look perfect! A scoop of rice, some orange chicken (spicy of course), and a egg roll on the side.

Bill Gates probably has a chef that lives in his house. I know I would if I had that kind of money. You would never have to worry about destroying dinner or forgetting to shop for breakfast food. I bet a professional Chef would take care of everything. Can you imagine? A refrigerator that was always full and every meal that you desire made at a moment's notice.

I might be a horrible chef, but once I make money I would hire one in a second. Fresh eggs, bacon, and toast every morning. Yeah, that's it. All that on my way to the office. I guess it might be time to visualize again.

Positive Thoughts and Beer

2010-09-27T17:45:00.001-07:00

I would make a horrible weather man. No build up to that statement and I really don't think I need to provide an explanation either. If you read my blog, you know I would not make a good weather man. Simple.

Well, it's Monday and that can only mean one thing... MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL! Oh football, my first love. Today was pretty slow for me. (Shocker!) This morning I was going through this process where I picture myself already landing a job, making good money, and visualizing that it all already happened. This practice is good in theory, but I tend to drift off with random thoughts instead of focusing on my positive thoughts. For example, I tried to sit down and do this exercise early today and you know what happened... I started thinking about Bill Gates. I wonder if Bill Gates enjoys the NFL? I wonder if he sits down with a beer and watches play by play? Will the Bears win?

I think I need to work a little more on this visualization theory. Maybe if I can focus my Mondays will start to be really busy again. Back to the game and welcome in week 4.

Seriously!!!

2010-09-19T18:37:00.000-07:00

Alright, I have come to term with the fact that what ever job I land will be positive. Yet, I am also extremely aware (thank you Bill Gates) that I will not be making hundreds of thousands of dollars. (No huge house on a remote lake for me this month.) This point has lead me to really think about what positions I am qualified for and what positions I would really be willing to take.

Hmmm... the one thing I came up with is I definitely would never want to be the guy responsible for the functionality of a web site. Que the Chase bank issue last week. How would you like to be the guy in a cubicle somewhere sipping on a cup of coffee when a panicked supervisor runs in and starts screaming at 8:30 in the morning. "The site... it's DOWN" screams the enraged supervisor! (At least that is how I imagined it happening.) PASS!!! Really, who in the world would want the kind of responsibility on their shoulders to fix an entire web site and all of its functions before hundreds of thousands people begin to realize they can't review how much money they spent the day before.

I would be glad to take on something a little more "simple".

Second Down and Four To Go

2010-09-12T11:06:00.000-07:00

Summer starts to fade away. Kids go back to school and we all receive a present that people around the country cherish. The return of the NFL. The National Football League. I can't help but to sit back and smile as I type those words. Can I even express how much I love this time of year? My favorite team is back, football starts, and more importantly fantasy football starts. Simple realization, but fantasy football is the closest I will ever get to being on a professional football team. I guess that is unless I actually meet Bill Gates, he purchases a football team, and somehow I make it as a kicker. Maybe he would even finally bring a team back to Los Angeles. Wow, I am full of lofty dreams this morning!

Can you for just one second, imagine making $20 million dollars a year (or more!) for playing football? Seriously, put the wings and beer down and think about it! Just ridiculous. Well, I am never making the salary of a professional football player, but I can tweak my line up to win the league this year. At least, I hope I can. Honestly, by the end of this season I better have a job. On or off the field.

Labor or UnLabor?

2010-09-04T17:38:00.000-07:00

Well, Happy Labor Day friends, family, and people who have not hired me yet. I would enjoy this long weekend along with everyone else, but my life has turned into a several month vacation. And, I am not sure that I can celebrate laboring when I haven't exactly labored in a while.

This brings me to the simple realization that I don't have to celebrate every holiday. It's not like I didn't know this already, but now I am stating it out loud. I have forgone an Easter or a St. Patricks Day celebration along the way (mainly due to illness) so why can't I not celebrate Labor Day? Bill Gates won't pay me to celebrate, actually no one will pay me to do anything. As I am typing this I can tell I am slowly moving away from my motivated self and getting closer to my bathrobe wearing self. I am changing this weekend to Happy Un-Labor Day. Now, that is a holiday I can currently enjoy. I say celebrate this weekend how ever you want. Lets roast some brats, have way too many beers, and call our ex-girlfriends (Scarlett) and beg them to take us back. Happy Labor/Un-Labor Day to all!

Whatever...

2010-08-30T20:45:00.000-07:00

After my last post, I just realized that it probably would of help to tell you that I did win a few dollars. I won't tell you exactly how much, but let's just say it was less than half of what I put in. Not exactly the results I was looking for, but whatever.

Obviously, this could be a lesson for us all. You would want to think that if you bought twenty tickets from one roll that you might have had a good chance at winning a substantial amount of money. Yet, I have just proved this not to be true. I tried to scratch each ticket with a new system. I tried scratching the winning number first. Then I tried the amount first. Regardless of what I tried, there were not many scratches that proved profitable. I wonder if Bill Gates has tried this theory out? Knowing his luck, each ticket might be a winner.

I know, no revelation here. I just wanted to further explain my scratch ticket adventure. Monday is gone and Tuesday is almost here. I hope something wonderful (meaning a potential interviewer) calls me back. Hello Tuesday! Alright, time to go to bed. Adios amigos!

Yet, Another Goodbye

2010-08-30T20:29:00.000-07:00

I would never admit this to anyone other than the few readers that just started to follow my blog, but I do have a confession. On my tight (a.k.a. unemployed) budget, I just made a purchase that I probably should have not made. The purchase was (wait for it) something I should not have spend money on (can you handle it?) and something that actually pays off for very few people. That's right, I spent my last few dollars on scratch tickets.

Alright, go ahead and make fun of a me, but a guy likes to scratch a lottery ticket here and there. I went ahead and withdrew a $20 bill from my local ATM, walked over to my favorite gas station, and went for it. Just as a side note... I promised the owner of the gas station to bring back the ticket if I won. Man, I am just a philanthropic individual if I say so myself.

Needless to say, I am adding another revelation after my post-scratching adventure. I may never win the lottery. Yes, I am man enough to tell you that I might let that pipe dream go. Goodbye Bill, adios Scarlett, and Auf Wiedersehen lottery tickets.

33

2010-08-30T15:36:00.001-07:00

No, that is not my age. Thirty-three is the number I am down to on my journey (or pathetic attempt) of self realization. I know it has been a few days since my last post and there is a reason for that. Unfortunately, I spent a few days of self-loathing after I didn’t get the last job I interview for. Don’t sound surprised!

I blocked any major “ah-ha” moments with my trusty six pack and handy bathrobe, which I have now dubbed my cape. Yesterday I finally had a friend come over, pull me out of my fortress of solitude and take me out to lunch. This friend (or lets say this current person I am forced to like even in my depression) is one of those people that made all the right decisions. He went to the right college, met the right people, spent the right amount of time at each business before moving on, found the right girl, the right house, the right salary… need I say more. This is exactly the type of friend you want to hang out with when you are also on the right path. In my situation, he was also the kind of friend that I wanted to hate since I am currently on no given path.

After a double cheeseburger with everything on it (including jalapenos) and a coke, I hit realization number 33… if he can do it so can I. Ugh, it pains me to say that, but I do have potential and the ability to rack in the dough even without the help of Bill Gates. I would of much rather focus on the cheesy meat instead of my future. Let’s just say, when he picked me up I hated him. When he dropped me off I was inspired. Thanks jerk. You better come pick me up for burgers next week just in case the robe somehow slips back on.

BLAH!!!

2010-08-25T15:46:00.000-07:00

Alright, I have no revelation to share today. I actually just have one simple question… When did the interview process get so hard? I went for a second interview today at a company, which I will leave anonymous, only to be bombarded by six different interviewers. Yes, I said SIX!!!!!!

I know I have been out of the interview game for awhile, but when did an entire office jump in on the interview process? After starting with the hiring manager, I moved onto the department head, the administrative assistant, and several other people in the immediate area. Honestly, I could feel my face flushing as one introduced the next and left the room. I couldn’t help but wonder what they thought of me. Did they like me? Would I fit in here? It kind of felt like high school all over again.

You know what, I take that back. I do have a revelation for today. I will never be a recruiter. I have no idea how Bill Gates started a company and hired his first team. I just don’t have the heart to drag someone through countless interviews only to tell them sorry. Interviewer # 4 didn’t think you would fit in with the corporate culture. Blah.

Six Reasons to Smile!

2010-08-23T20:31:00.000-07:00

After my post last week things have started to turn around. No, Bill Gates did not show up at my door step, but I finally took off the bathrobe and had a job interview. I didn’t exactly get the job, but at least I am headed in the right direction. During my diligent job search (thank you Craigslist) I have noticed that many companies are hiring “model types” to be servers or bartenders. Hmmm. Well, I am no George Clooney, so I don’t think I would get hire for one of the positions.

Maybe I could bartend at a local dive joint. I know how to make a car bomb and definitely can open a bottle of beer. Ah, beer. I think this eloquently carries into my next realization. The only six-pack I will ever have will be located in my fridge. As I said, I am not the chiseled model type. I am not overweight, but you are certainly not going to find any definition on my stomach except my bellybutton and I am OK with that. So, yes, I can learn not to spend time looking for model type work just as easy as I can tell Scarlett we are over. Finally, I am learning to accept me. Thirty four more to come. Be patient!

Only 35 More To Go

2010-08-17T09:52:00.000-07:00

Well, it has been five months and I am still feeling the recession hanging over me like a wet towel. Although this new found freedom (a.k.a. unemployment) started me on a journey to face reality, I did fall into a small slump. Some might even call it a major depression. If you don’t know me and my depression is now making you depressed I have the name of a fabulous doctor I can share. In the meantime, why not listen to me some more?

Back to becoming self aware. Lets recap my first two “ah-ha” moments since it has been some time. One: Bill Gates and I will never meet under the green awning of a gas station and become buds. Two: Scarlett and I will never become buds or even more than buds at any point in my unemployed or even employed life. Now, these prior realizations (as great as they are) are now leading me to my next life changing fact.

Three: I may never be a CEO. Not to say that I am not shooting for the stars here. Basically, I have to start somewhere and believing that I am going the make the salary of a CEO straight from my bathrobe makes no sense. Sorry Fortune 500 companies. You may just have to wait and let me flourish and build my career. Maybe if I started my own company I could be a CEO or even a CFO by tomorrow. Okay, back to reality. You need a plan, an idea, a product. Thank you realization number 3 for bringing me back down. Maybe I should start with a managerial position.

Okay, on my first blog I promised 37 more. 37-2 = 35. Bear with me. This self actualization may take a little longer than I thought. Now to log out, take off the bathrobe, and find that job.

Never Going To Happen

2010-03-11T08:43:00.000-08:00

They just said on the radio that the recession may, in fact, be over. Hmmm. A quick look at my post recession bank account seems to indicate otherwise.

Really there is nothing like this daily, post-recession checking account viewing to humble a person (me) and make them (me again) face the dim light of reality. But perhaps there's a silver lining. Perhaps this staring into the financial abyss every day, can yield immense spiritual and psychological rewards? Right?

One thing for sure, it really has helped me to rid myself of extraneous pipe dreams, and by default (on my loans I mean) to become a more realistic, honest-with-myself type of human being. Here's two things I now know are never going to happen. And with each of these just think how much more of an honest, sober and self aware human being I will become:

The gas station in Medina Washington where I will not pump gas

waiting for a new car or a friendly hand-out from Bill Gates

1. I will never become the lucky recipient of Bill Gates' benign altruism. Okay there, I said it. As ridiculous as it may seem, I've been holding onto this as a remote sort of plan B for years. You know the urban myth of the kindly gas station attendant whose friendly smile earns him the the generosity of a dying millionaire? Kid wakes up one morning to find himself the heir to a vast fortune? Okay... I'm taking a deep breath... here it goes, I'm going to say it:

It ain't gonna happen.

As bad as things have gotten, I'm not moving to Medina Washington to pump gas on the outside shot that my smile will win me Gates beneficence. In short: Bill Gates is dead to me. He's never going to make me an heir, he's never going to give a new car, he's never going to acknowledge me in any way. Although, I suppose its possible he might flip a coin in my hat some day, as I play my harmonica for tips on a corner in downtown Medina.

2. This next one is tough. But its not so tough as looking at that savings account of mine. So I think I can do it. I mean I'm uniquely prepared by my financial situation to look honestly at my self... Here we go... Okay, to quote the famous choo choo train: "I think I can... I think I can..."

Sorry Scarlet, I'm over you

Scarlet, it's over between us. Yes I know it never really began. But I was quite confident over the years that you and I would some day make beautiful music together. Unless this is going to happen on a street corner in Medina Washington (and why not?) we're through. I know its nowhere near as difficult for you as it is for me. Nevertheless, I am a better man for honestly admitting that you are beyond my humble means. Goodbye. Good luck. Good riddance!

--With no small amount of bitterness about the way it all turned out

--Me

Okay, well that's two pipe dreams gone forever. Enough, I think, for one day. Hoping to get to the other 37 in the next few days...

Anyway, now its time to reflect. To take a deep breath. To glory in my new found sense of honest reflection... and, beyond everything else, to log out and go get a job!